5 Top Tips When Planning a Funeral Tribute

Blogs & Articles Article 5 Top Tips When Planning a Funeral Tribute
5 Top Tips

There is no legal obligation to hold a funeral service at all, plus it’s not an easy topic of conversation. Families should have a discussion, at some point, to decide on what sort of funeral they would prefer. It might be a very brief conversation at the pub ‘I would rather be buried/cremated’… or even ‘I really don’t care, I won’t be around’ but at least it’s a start.

Funerals, broadly speaking, fall into three categories of religious, less religious and non-religious. Whatever your religion, the customs and traditions of a familiar structured service can offer great peace of mind in your place of worship. Non or ‘less’ religious funerals have edged away from the ‘very traditional’ emphasising the life of the person. Either service has flexibility to add personal touches such as musical or spoken tributes.

Spoken tributes are key to a ‘good’ funeral .

“He liked to drink and he liked to fight” was the shortest (and most unusual) tribute I’ve heard over the years. So what needs to be considered when planning and delivering a good tribute.

5 points to consider when writing a funeral tribute:

  • Less is more…no it really is. The temptation to cover every detail is overwhelming, particularly if they have had a long life. But typically around 4-5 minutes is about right.
  • Keep it personal…Short stories rather than lists of facts are more interesting to listen to. Ideally these will be stories where you were involved. Make sure it’s more about them than you though!
  • Keep it positive…If there are difficult topics to cover the congregation will probably already be aware. You don’t need to break the news to them during the funeral.
  • Keep a written copy to hand. Don’t risk standing up with only bullet points. If overcome with emotion someone else can stand in and help with a speech written in full. Use a large font if you’re typing it out.
  • Keep it conversational. Talk clearly and slowly. Look at your listeners and make eye contact while talking to them. You are sharing your personal experiences with them, they are as privileged as you are to be a part of this, but that doesn’t mean you need to lecture them.

Always remember that everyone there is behind you 100% so stay calm and take your time.

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James and the team at A H Freemantle did the most fantastic job for us when my brother died suddenly and unexpectedly. They were very clear about the things I had to make a decision on - not there and then but in my own time - but they also completely took over and seamlessly managed all those other things that have to be booked and paid for. They also gave me great advice about how to handle the things I needed to handle. They contributed hugely to giving my brother the send off that he deserved and I wouldn't hesitate to recommend A H Freemantle to anyone else when that time comes and you need a funeral director.

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Brian Stoker

Extremely kind & considerate. Very professional. I felt supported throughout a very difficult process. Jane was fantastic, sensitive and caring and made me feel that she truly understood and cared about us all.

Jill Spence

From my first phone call to the completion of the funeral the staff at A H Freemantle gave outstanding service. They were professional and compassionate, taking time to listen to our requests and discuss the options. They made a difficult time easier and I knew I could trust them absolutely with the arrangements.

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Eleanor Campbell-Loveday

James and the team really are who you need by your side when you are facing your most challenging times in life. I've been in need of the services of A H Freemantle twice in a year having lost both my mother and father. Honestly I couldn't recommend them enough, at such a challenging time they really did do everything to make it as bearable as possible. I can not recommend James and the team enough, they were truly incredible from start to finish.

Chris

I can’t praise Claire at the Botley branch enough, who looked after my husband’s funeral. She was very professional, but more than that she was kind, caring, and nothing was too much trouble. Going above and beyond, which made this very difficult time so much more bearable for my family and I.

Nicola Abbott

Sarah's kindness, genuine warmth, understanding of the personal character of how people say goodbye to a loved one, and inclusive approach, together with her knowledge and professionalism made me feel 'held' throughout the process of organising and being at my mum's funeral. It made such a difference at a difficult time. Highly recommend this company to anyone.

Kes

Having had experience with this company earlier in the year they were the natural choice when my wife died. Clair was absolutely brilliant from the initial enquiry and compassionately and clearly explained the whole process. Nothing was too much trouble and the whole range of options clearly laid out and explained. We really didn’t have to do anything ourselves. I would gladly recommend when the the time comes to anyone else.

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